As a highly sensitive human, I often find myself feeling exhausted for no real reason.
I notice it happening more when I spend time around emotionally draining people.
(This is because I energetically “merge” with others without realising. If you’re an empath, you probably do this, too.)
Socialising can be exhausting for empaths, so if you’re feeling drained after spending time with people, it’s important to know how to refuel your energy tank.
1. Spot the signs.
The first step is to look out for red flags that signal subtle shifts in your energy, like exhaustion, fatigue, burnout, irritability, or restlessness.
If you spend a lot of time supporting or caring for others, you might notice yourself feeling overwhelmed at the thought of spending time with them.
Personally, I know my energy’s being drained when I:
- Start avoiding certain people or activities
- “Mask” my feelings and force myself to smile or be pleasant
- Get stressed much more easily
- Ignore messages, calls, or emails
- Feel disillusioned with my relationships
When you’re aware of the first signs of your energy waning, it becomes easier to deal with the root cause (i.e. emotionally draining interactions) quickly.
2. Spend time alone.
Personally, I need A LOT of alone time to recover from socialising. It’s how I reset, recharge, and recalibrate my nervous system.
Spending time with people—even awesome people who love and care about me—can result in sensory overload and leave me feeling drained, so it’s vital for me to take time to rest.
And if I’ve been at a party or a crowded place? I need at least a day to myself.
If this resonates with you, try spending more time alone.
Meditate, journal, read, take a nap, practice breathwork, make something, listen to music, go for a walk, or catch up on life admin.
3. Practice basic self-care.
Energy is energy—what you put in affects what you get out.
I know I feel worse if I eat tons of sugar, drink a lot of coffee, or stay inside all day. So to optimise your energy, get back to basics with your self-care.
Drink water and stay hydrated. Eat fresh whole foods. Switch off your phone. Pause your coffee and alcohol intake. Go outside in the sunshine (or rain). Breathe in fresh air. Move your body in a way that feels good. Read something inspiring. Get an early night. Take plenty of pleasure breaks.
Feed your mind, body, and soul well. Even if it’s just for one day. See how you feel.
Think of this step as your inhale to get your energy levels back to baseline.
4. Speak to the people in your life.
This final step is your exhale.
Once you’ve recovered your energy, reflect on what triggered your emotional exhaustion.
Are there commitments you need to let go of or say no to? Are you giving more than you’re receiving in a certain relationship? Do you spend too much time with energy vampires?
Get clear on your needs and desires. Nobody can give you what you want unless you ask for it.
A great catch-all request for empaths to use with emotionally draining people is:
“This might surprise you, but I find social interaction really tiring. I get exhausted and overwhelmed and need [rest/space/alone time] to recover. I want you to know it’s not personal, but if I’m ever feeling this way I’ll let you know. How does that feel to you?”
However you decide to handle this, clear, honest, and open communication is always the best strategy.
